racing and stopping

There is no real way to get ready for leaving. It’s something that I’ve had to do a bunch of and I am in the process of doing that right now. The last time I had to get ready to leave, I didn’t know.

As I boarded the flight with my wife, I didn’t know that my visa to return to the UK would be refused three weeks later. I didn’t know that getting on that plane would mark the beginning of being away from my kids for two months. I wonder how I would have reacted if I had known.

Now, my family and I are preparing to leave Poland. This is the third time we’ve moved in three years. We are hoping that this will be the last time for a while. At least, a big move like this. Moving within a town would be mostly ok, and will even be necessary, but we are ready to be done. We’re ready to find a place where we can stay and grow.

Life in lockdown has shown us that we need friends. I need friends. Besides my wife, my closest friend is all the way in California. Right now, that’s a 9-hour time difference which makes contact a practical impossibility. At least with any consistency. And so, like my kids, I am hoping that this next move brings the opportunity for friends.

One of the things about moving is that it comes with this weird pace. It feels like there is everything to be done until one day, there’s nothing to be done. Right now it feels like everything and nothing all at the same time.

Travel hasn’t officially opened as I write this. I can’t even apply for my next visa for another six weeks. So we race and we stop all at once. And it is tiring.